The sounds of Poor Bear are Calling

Bismillah
I thought I could ignore the pregnancy factor for a while and stick to the basics of the monthly check-ups, eating healthy and prayer for a safety pregnancy, birth and life for our child. I have to mention that the moments of excitement and I have not yet crossed paths, somehow it feels surreal to be in this position as if I have been here already ‘what’s new?’ that kind of thing. I have not been browsing in baby isles and fantasising about baby courts and rooms, actually I have always known what I want and when the time comes I will pull out my shopping list. I am not for the universal notion that blue is for boys and pink for girls either, what about all the other colours God created? I also do not do the typical baby/nappy bag; I have actually discovered prettier, versatile, chic and more stylish bags that serve both mommy and baby, along with the miniature compact baby goods that will fit in them. Yes as you have figured out already, I am most of the time the meticulous freak but I am not ignorant to the fickleness of life and a baby.
However today images of my siblings when they were babies flashed by and I remember the feeling of holding their little fingers, how this little being’s hope is all on you to feed it, protect it and teach it. How my brother Ja’far loved paging through the Poor Bear books and told me stories by interpreting the pictures in the book. How Tahera used to turn red when she was angry and how Zaharah just ate and ate and ate. To all mothers to be, I am telling you now! Looking after a baby is much easier than running after it when it starts to crawl, not to mention when it starts to talk! Then you are in trouble.
Having a supportive husband is a bonus in this period when you are just a bag of assorted emotions. The other day he actually found supplements which really treat me better than the ones the doctor prescribed as the best.
My beloved is also precautiously excited but I can see the hope his heart and eyes are filled with, and how he always refers to the baby as if it is already here. I have to sit and watch TV with him because he wants to watch TV with his child, have to keep fit for his child’s sake and the friendly reminders through text messages that I should not feed his child spicy food (I love my Portuguese & Indian spices) or unhealthy food, the greatest reminder being to pray and fast for Allah to give us Hope.

Allah a re fe Katlego le Tshepo.
May Allah give us Hope indeed, Ameen.
30 June 2010

Ridge Forrester has got nothing on this guy!

Bismillah
How do you define romance? In my past life when I was a teenager and the hormones started kicking in and the fantasy world became more intense. The typical fantasy of romance would be the Hero of my dream world would save me from ‘dangerous danger’ and whisk me to an exotic land filled with paradise birds, chirping in beautiful harmonies, and if I were to tone down the fantasy he would be a working man who brings me flowers and chocolates every day, ever the volunteer to massage my feet and have hidden romantic surprises at every turn.
According to the thesaurus romance is a synonym to a story, fiction, legend, fable etc. So why for eons have popular culture and society imposed on us that if your relationship lacks the typical romance, it is as good as a meal for dogs? Why should a relationship hang on a fable? Is it because people like living in fantasy? Why should we spend time torturing our husbands and sulking because they are just not as fiction as Ridge Forrester? Take a good look at yourself honey, you are not Brooke either!
So how do I define romance? Firstly, it was my Mom’s wisdom of forbidding me from watching soapies that lead me to new classifications of romance, which lead to my thoughts, lifestyle and fantasies being in tune with reality. Secondly, now that I am all grown up, I find myself in a reality where flowers wreak havoc with my sinuses and chocolates everyday would send that man out the door as I wholly assume a double bed was designed for two people and not a double person. Thirdly this ‘romance’ thing has to greatly work with your needs and wants in the relationship. I love the occasional strawberries and cream but I prefer my health and the way my size 34 clothes fit more.
In my marriage romance has revealed itself as the helpful hand from my husband when I need it, be it helping me prepare food or wash the dishes, and the way he emphasis on praying and eating together. The honesty, loyalty and support I get from him without even asking for it. The understanding that today my engine could only take me this far and it needs his turbo boost to go on. Yes I do get the occasional chocolate and ‘romantic’ poems and notes, but don’t go thinking the grass is greener on this side!
Nevertheless I have decided I will let my husband love me the way that he wants to love me, and on the day I decided to do that I realised...
Ridge Forrester has got nothing on this guy!!!